Koz’s Mini-Bowl – Milwaukee, WI

D.Rough and I were in Milwaukee (one of my favorite cities in the US) for the 2013 World Championships of Roller Derby. Our friends CorpseKitten and TheLatvian from Kalamazoo, Michigan, also met us in Milwaukee for a weekend hangout and we had a great weekend. I had heard about this “mini bowling” alley from a few websites and thought we’d make a double date out of it. I had a very rough idea of what was going to happen in this particular bar on the South side of Minneapolis, but the other three were going in blindly, and only trusting me a little bit on this one. Probably smart on their part.

As we drove past what the GPS told us was the address, D.Rough sounded dubious – “this looks like someone’s house…” I retorted, “But there’s a beer sign in the window!” TheLatvian replied, “This is Wisconsin. Everyone has a beer sign in their window.” Fair enough. But, we went in anyway.

I’m soooooo glad we did. The place is dimly let, but in a home-y way, not a seedy scary way. And it IS NOT a house – it’s an actual bar. There’s a full bar, a pool table, a juke box in the front room. And in the back room is the bowling. Duckpin bowling to be precise.

My father taught me about duckpin and candlepin bowling when I was a kid – my family has a pretty serious bowling legacy (I’m not kidding). If it helps you visualize it, take a standard bowling pin and squash it down about half way, so it’s short and fat. Duckpin bowling is traditionally a west coast thing, but they’re also in Milwaukee and Indianapolis. You throw a small bowling ball with no finger holes (about like a softball or bocce ball) and it’s an extra short lane – about 20 feet.

Picture skee-ball, but with pins.

The guy behind the bar was super nice, which we appreciated as first-timers. He told us a lane was actually open and ready to rock. He grabbed us a score sheet, told us how much the games were each, and reminded us to tip the pinsetters. There are actual human pin setters that kick the pins out of the way after each frame or reset up the pins in a triangle format. Manually. None of this automated machinery stuff. Then, the bartender recommended some drinks. I knew I liked this guy.

Two bonuses at Koz’s: they don’t have low ball glasses. Mixed drinks are in a pint glass, the way I make them at home. Also, the mug of beer I ordered was $1.50. Thank you, Wisconsin!!!

I’d love to tell you how awesome this evening was, but it’s difficult. It’s super fast paced and there’s lots of mocking and high-fives. Plus the awesome juke box kept getting stocked with awesome 80’s and 90’s music. You can ask the bartender what the standard tip is for the pinsetters, since these guys are dodging balls and pins flying around behind their protective shield. Dangerous and back-breaking work, for sure. But waaaay more fun than standard bowling, in my opinion.

And did I mention this place has a taxidermy lion and other creepy taxidermy??? BAM!

You really need to check this place out. They are open until bar close so around 2am, which is even better. I think you can call ahead and reserve a lane if you want, but we rolled right in on a Saturday night and got an open lane. Perfect night.

[Note: I found out we were supposed to be throwing three balls per frame, but we only threw two like standard bowling. Bummer for me, since I would have bowled higher than the 238 I bowled!]

www.kozsminibowl.com

Bryant Lake Bowl – Minneapolis, MN

I’ve been a fan of Bryant Lake Bowl since I moved here, but strangely, I’ve never done a post about it. Since we’ve been shooting down HotGirlsBrother’s idea to go to the Country Bar every week after eyeopeners, we’ve been jumping at the chance to try fun places after morning drinking on Sundays. This week, he suggested Bryant Lake Bowl, and I GLADLY obliged. We called a couple of the eyeopener no-shows and told them we were walking over to Bryant Lake Bowl and they could meet us there.

I know Smallz ranks the Bryant Lake Bowl in his top 5 places with BBQ pulled pork, so I knew right away what I was going to get: The BBQ Bowler. It’s a biscuit topped with pulled pork and cheddar scramble and served with greens. You HAVE to get the BLB fries when you’re there, so it’s best to replace the greens with BLB fries and save yourself the trouble of regret. This is exactly what I did.

The service here is almost always good, so no complaints there. The guy made sure we were well taken care. He brought out our food pretty quickly, especially considering how busy there were during lunch on a Sunday.

As usual, this meal was perfect. I agree the pulled pork is one of the best in the area and this time was no different. Flaky biscuit and lots of pork and eggs. I threw some sri racha on the potatoes (they’re cut in slices, like potato chips), and that kicked them up to the appropriate level. I REALLY like this dish and I’d recommend it at any time of day. However, I know there are people who simply can’t eat eggs at non-breakfast times – I don’t get it, but I have to accept it.

Sorry there wasn’t a lot of detail in this post, but it’s pretty short and simple. I’m biased since I eat here every once in a while and I don’t want to share too many of those biases. They do also have some great girly drinks if that’s your thing. Normally, it’s my thing, but I had plenty at the VFW, so I was already set. Just go here. You won’t regret anything about BLB. Heck, bowl a couple of games afterwards. It only adds to the charm of this place.

www.bryantlakebowl.com

Surdyk’s Scotch Tasting Class – Minneapolis, MN

This event was actually held at Elsie’s Banquet Room down the street from Surdyk’s, but Surdyk’s was running the thing. I ended up going solo as one of my high school chums bailed on me (legitimate reason, truly). There was a bit of trouble finding the place due to some heavy construction near there, but I found it nonetheless. I also had Gerd drop me off because I intended to not be in any condition to drive after the event. (Well played, in retrospect…)

I joined a table full of guys my age who didn’t look too doosh-y. Two were kind of the intelligent poet types, and the other two were the college 5 o'clock shadow kind of guys. I didn’t butt in on any of their conversations, but they included me a couple of times. Nice guys actually.

The instructor’s assistant filled everyone’s glass with scotch and then the class got started. I learned all about the history, legal terms, distilling, bottling, and regions related to scotch. And with a different sample of scotch every 15 minutes or so, it went very smoothly. Now when I say sample, I mean two small glasses of scotch (multiply by 7, and you get 14 – actually, what you do is lose count). Sure you can dump remainders into the bucket in the middle of your table, but why waste good scotch when you’ve got a designated driver?

There were two glasses for each person. A smaller wine glass and also a highball glass. The instructor said you get different flavors and different aromas from the different glass styles. Additionally, you get a different aroma by smelling the bottom rim of the glass than you do smelling the top rim of the glass. Prior to this, I would have called Bull-jive. But after testing this theory, he was 100% right. See, I learned something. 4 TOTALLY different smells. Freakshow science, I tell you.

There were also table settings with three kinds of fancy cheese on them (all sold at Surdyk’s) and small pieces of bread and nuts and such. To sort of cleanse your palette or soak up alcohol in your guts.

I learned a ton of other things which were super cool, and I got to try out some Scotches I wouldn’t have wanted to gamble a purchase on (since it’s not cheap). The guy giving the class was REALLY knowledgeable and pretty funny. I don’t know that we’d hang out or anything, but he was a great instructor.

In order of liking on my part (purely opinion – I’m sure this will make SOMEONE mad)
1. Speyside 12yr Single Malt
2. Bruichladdich 12yr Single Malt
3. Islay Mist Blended
4. Springbank 10yr Single (not to be confused with SpringBreak)
5. Dewars Blended
6. Glen Salen Blended Malt
7. Laphroaig 10yr Single (tasted like a cup of dirt – two cups of dirt actually, heh heh)

If you get a chance to do any sort of tasting or class event with Surdyk’s, I’d recommend it highly. They have a class act operation. I was hoping they’d have some sort of announcement about a scotch sale, but they didn’t. They did offer 10% off retail price if you bought scotch that night though. I didn’t. Though, I do need to stock up. I’m running dangerously low on scotch right now.

Top 5 things about the scotch class
1. Really good way to learn to appreciate scotch
2. Speyside might need a visit from Chao
3. Awesome Cheese – especially the Aged Gouda from Amsterdam
4. Great mix of history, present, operations, and tasting
5. Classy banquet facility, despite being in a bowling alley (my family loves bowling alleys, don’t ask)

Bottom 5 things
1. Laphroaig is VERY peat-y
2. Made me want to drop a few hundred on alcohol
3. Made me want to drop a few thousand on a trip to Scotland
4. I was a loner
5. Finding the place

http://www.surdyks.com

http://www.elsies.com

Gameworks – Minneapolis, MN

I’m embarrassed I’ve never to bee to a place like this as an adult. I’ve been to Chuck E. Cheese, Showbiz, Razzmatazz, and Tex Critters, but never Gameworks or Dave & Busters. So it was time to go I guess.

We grabbed a bite to eat in the restaurant to make an evening of it. Curt, our host was an awesome guy and Corey, our waiter was awesome as well. Both super helpful and not pushy. Corey hooked us up with an appetizer sampler which had Thai rolls, chicken strips, cheese sticks, and Tater skins on it. All were good, though Gerd wasn’t a fan of the Thai rolls. I liked em fine for cracker Thai. My standards are low though.

Gerd had a Caesar salad for her meal since the app was pretty big. I got a half slab of ribs. They weren’t great ribs, but they were passable. Better then Appleby’s or Chili’s though. But the best part is the availability of Mt. Dew there – awwww yeah.

We finished and went upstairs for some bowling. I performed miserably in all honesty. We played four games next to a bachelorette party of trixies. It was a pretty eclectic crowd overall. After 10pm, they throw out all the kids under 21, so it clears out momentarily. Then the club people show up to play games and drink.

We finished up bowling and hit the bar for a quick sit-down before playing more video games. They have some pretty good girly drinks, honestly. All kinds of stuff with ice cream in it, which ruled. Though our bartender, She-ra (yes that was her name) thought I was a girl when she strolled up. ha ha. Gerd and I shot some hoops (and I won) and we played some Arctic Thunder (which is one of Gerd’s all-time favorite games). She schooled me on that game, but I came back to tie it up with a round of something-or-other car racing. We played some House of the Dead 4 and Hydro Thunder (the aquatic version of Artic Thunder). And we played enough skiball to win tickets for some Mike and Ikes (Coach’s favorite).

We left feeling like 14 year olds, and will probably be back. I’d like to hit up Dave & Buster’s to see the difference, so I’ll let you know how that is.

Top 5 things about Gameworks
1. Bowling with black lights
2. Girly drinks
3. Arctic thunder
4. Bachelorette party
5. The card system for paying for games rules

Bottom 5 things
1. Juggalos
2. Gerd got upset because the basketball game took her money but wouldn’t let her play
3. Far too many Golden Tee games
4. I’m terrible at video games
5. The place can get packed on a weekend night

http://www.gameworks.com/locations/minneapolis.php

Playing Wii at M and Trash’s house - Minneapolis, MN

If you didn’t know, Gerd is a Wii junkie, which is hilarious because she doesn’t own a Wii. There have been emergency trips to Best Buy to play the demo models there. There have been children pushed out of way to play Wii games. There have been hours where she disappeared at friends’ houses during parties when she discovered they had Wii. Since this Wii was purchased by M a few weeks ago, this topic has come up at least 10 times a day at random points. “Hmmm, it’s warm out. I wonder what M’s Wii is doing now.” (Sad but true.)

We got invited over to M and Trash Giant’s house to play some Wii. We showed up with some girly drinks – my specialty. I whipped up a couple of orange or green colored drinks for us, got yelled at for not utilizing THEIR liquor, and we headed to the basement.

Trash told M and I that we would be boxing for her amusement. The last time we played, I got my ass handed to me (clearly M had been watching old game tapes of Mike Tyson). This time, I focused on two moves and returned the ass-handing to my good friend M. I also threw in some sweet dance moves for the ladies’ entertainment.

We played some tennis, which we all played poorly, but was hilarious. Then we did some bowling, which Trash REALLY gets into. She flails about wildly and kicks her feet (did I mention this is bowling?). So you know, they made those wrist straps for Trash. She commanded I stand up while I bowl because I figured out how to bowl while leaning back on the couch. I was a couch Wii star in my own eyes, and still managed to get over a hundred.

We ate craploads of candy, and had a couple of drinks, which puts Trash right to sleep. But we had to end the night with the most pointless game of all time. It’s called Cooking Mama. You have to stir things and crack eggs and peel vegetables. M and I loathe this game, yet somehow ended up giving advice to help out Gerd. Gerd loves games without a point. I think this way, she doesn’t feel like someone else can beat her. You have no idea how pointless this game is, so do yourself a favor and don’t find out.

We can’t wait for the next trip to their house. We always end up leaving with a headache from laughing so hard. I’m trying to live up to the high expectations of providing quality girly drinks, so I’ll have to come up with something new. If you’ve got suggestions, send ‘em over.