Burger Jones – Minneapolis, MN

When TheDoctor calls for lunch, I find it difficult to pass up, which is why we’ve done lunch twice this week (so far). My lunch plans with KingDavid had just been canceled like 2 minutes before he called, so I jumped at the chance to eat copious amounts of food with TheDoctor, especially when he told me he had a hankering for burgers. I suggested Burger Jones since our friends BloodCar and EyeHeartPizza had raved about it.

I got there a little early, since I was so excited about lunch. I checked out the menu and ordered the Tri-Fry Tower – hand-cut russet fries, maple-bacon sweet potato fries, and parmesan waffle fries with three different dipping sauces – seasoned sour cream, bourbon BBQ, and Chipotle Aioli. I figured TheDoctor would sit down and be able to start shoveling food into his mouth. I heard he’s a fan of that. I checked out the drink menu and had ordered a strawberry shake. I flipped over the menu and saw a bunch of wildly delicious-looking shakes I missed during the first pass. I called the waiter back and asked if it was too late to change my shake order. I needed the Revenge of the Nerds shake – vanilla milkshake with Cruzan Raspberry Rum, strawberry, vanilla and LOTS of Nerds. Seriously, it’s like this place was made specifically for me.

TheDoctor showed up finally and took a look at the menu as well. I warned him there were fries coming, so not to concern himself with that. We both found a couple of things we liked and decided we’d just order two burgers and cut them into halves. I love it when a plan comes together. I decided to go with the White Trash Burger – chicken-fried bacon, fried cheese curds, and velveeta. TheDoctor got the Green Chile Cheeseburger – spicy green chile salsa, pepperjack, and a giant onion ring. I ask again, was this place made specifically for me? I think yes.

There’s also a small tab clipped to the menu for a lunch deal they’re running called the BJ Nooner – Yes, I think they know what they’ve put on paper there, if you’re wondering. It’s a cheeseburger and fries for $7.99 M-F 11-3. Decent special. And the name is hilarious.

The fries came out on what looks like some sort of metal sacrificial altar. They were delicious, honestly. Even the regular fries were pretty good, but the maple bacon sweet potato fries and the parmesan waffle friea were equally good. I wish the sweet potato fries were a little more bacon-y, but you can’t have everything. They were fantastic, especially with the dipping sauces. I’m not always a dipping sauce kind of guy, but all three of these were fantastic. Well played, Burger Jones. And what the hell happened off-camera that TheDoctor is so horrified at? You’ll never know…

The shake was delicious. I’m still a little weird about mixing alcohol with milkshakes (and believe me, I’ve tried dozens of times), but this was pretty good, especially with the nerds thrown in. Just a faint hint of strawberry/raspberry in it, and occasionally, you’d suck a nerd through the straw too hard and it would hit the back of your skull like a bullet, but whatever. It was a great lunch girly drink.


The burgers came out and we were both impressed with them. The patties themselves seemed a little small, but I think there were enough toppings on there to make both of us happy. And looking at the photos now, the patties were NOT small, there must have been a boatload of toppings and illusionary stuff going on. Seriously – chicken-fried bacon and cheese curds on a burger? Brilliant. I got a little photo happy, since I was pretty excited about these burgers.

Here's both burgers together, cross-sectional-style:

I even got a photo of TheDoctor forgoing all tact and couth and putting them both together and taking one giant bite.

The chicken-fried bacon was stellar, as were the cheese curds. Even the Velveeta cheese was an addition (it isn’t usually) to the flavor of this thing. Great burger flavor and great toppings. The green chile cheeseburger took the crown though. It was seriously awesome. I was even able to extract the entire onion out of the onion ring while still on the burger. That move right there made the burger officially perfect. The green chile wasn’t that spicy, but was great with the pepperjack. And now I’m going to have to listen to TheDoctor remind me that he should order for me from now on, since I always like his food better. Maybe next time, I’ll let that happen. He does have a pretty good track record for one of my heterosexual friends (supposedly).

If you get a chance, go here. I think you’ll find a few different things you’ll like and you’ll probably recommend it to as many people as I’m going to. I was very happy with it. Awesome waiter, huge beer list with some girly beers for people like me, and some awesome girly fun drinks.

They have cloth napkins, so I can take Trash there for dinner.

Top 5 things about Burger Jones
1. Green Chile Cheeseburger
2. White Trash Burger
3. Tri-Fry Tower (and dipping sauces)
4. Revenge of the Nerds shake
5. Really good staff

Bottom 5 things
1. The place isn’t cheap, but then again, I didn’t eat a tiny bit of food…
2. You can’t get alcoholic shakes to go. Sadface
3. Eating here reminded me of my awesome roommate EyeHeartPizza before she moved back to Denver
4. There are no more bad things!!!
5.

www.burgerjones.com