Saturday, October 18, 2008

Bayside Grille – Excelsior, MN

Gerd and I were looking for someplace a little different for dinner. We honestly picked at random and ended up with Bayside Grille. Still not sure how, but that’s besides the point. (Probably some sort of Saved By The Bell reference, knowing Gerd...) Here’s how it went:

Some of you may remember I mentioned Gerd's version of Google Maps doesn't draw driving routes accurately at all. It's kind of off the grid. It's a wonder we found this place. Here's an example of what I'm talking about...

We pulled into a large parking lot full of cars, so we were thinking this is a hoppin' place. We walked near the front of the Bayview Event Center or banquet hall or something - NOT bayside anything. There was a young man out front who ran out to greet us at the sidewalk entrance. “You guys here for the wedding?” “Uh, no. We’re here to eat.” The guy seemed disappointed, but told us we needed to go around the side. What the “side” was ended up being the alley between buildings filled with garbage dumpsters and trash. We weren’t even sure it was the right place. We hadn’t seen anything with the word Bayside on it – only Bayview. We go around behind the wedding party tent and find a pretty non-descript building that might be a bar. It was!!! At last – the Bayside Grille (We think – still not identified really).

We sidled up to the bar and got some drinks with the locals. And they were “local” - everyone knew the bartenders and everyone was drunk. The bartenders were actually super good, just a little quirky. Otto and Brad really hooked us up though. No complaints – they were very attentive and made sure we were happy.

We ordered some drinks and got some nachos for an appetizer. Otto warned us the nachos were large. When they came out, we were shocked. It was a heaping mound of chips and awesome cheesy goodness. There were three things on top of the heap – an ice cream scoop of guacamole, an ice cream scoop of sour cream, and a pile of salsa. Looked really good, but really intimidating. Brad set the pile down, turned around and then the guacamole ball rolled down the huge pile and plopped onto the bar. All the drunk people clapped and cheered. Hilarious. The nachos were seriously awesome though. The cheese was really good – not even sure what kind it was – I get confused with my melted cheese when it’s white (Why’s it gotta be white? – that’s for you Al). We destroyed way more of this pile than we expected to.

Gerd and I weren’t quite full yet, so I ordered the Chicken Burrito Dano (yes, seriously as in "Book 'em, Dano") and Gerd ordered the Prime Rib – she’d been talking about it for hours. When those came out, Gerd was underwhelmed. The prime rib had an odd look to it. She cut into it and was even more confused. She took a bite of it and was almost angry. It was the worst piece of meat ever. Honestly, there are high school cafeteria meat-flavored patties that were better than this. She’s kind of a meat person (snob), so she ended up having like 4 bites and pushed it away. It was honestly terrible. However, the mashed potatoes were REALLY awesome. Here - take a look at this prime rib we brought home and won't eat. I don't think you can tell exactly how bad it is from the photo, but even the texture looks "off".

The burrito was pretty standard tasting for a gringo-restaurant burrito. It was really huge though, so I can’t complain. It filled me up something fierce, so all in all, I’d rank it about a 6 on the ten scale.

We got super full, but we wouldn’t recommend going to this place (unless you’re going to have drinks and get nachos, then Otto and Brad are your boys).

Top 5 things about the Bayside Grille
1. Nachos
2. Brad and Otto
3. Bathroom was really cool
4. The marina is actually beautiful
5. Burrito was good for gringos

Bottom 5 things
1. Prime rib blew
2. Had to walk through a smelly alley to get there
3. Drunk locals
4. Driving there and getting out of the compound is confusing
5. Menu was pretty limited. Not many choices

1 comment:

maximillian_x said...

"People, the prime rib is made of people!"